Katie's Monologue

The character Katie, grapples with her feelings towards her neighbor Rae, after having a heartfelt conversation with one of her students.

I helped a student today.  I think.  Maybe.  I hope.  Her name's Harper, she's been trying to talk to me all week, but I kept getting pulled into meetings. I don't know how I'm supposed to help my students if I constantly have to be worried about the principal breathing down my neck.  Anyways, Harper and I finally got a moment alone and it turns out what she wants to know is how to ask a girl out.  We're sitting there in the empty classroom with the fluorescent lights buzzing in the background. There is a poster about consent behind her that I'm staring at because I can't quite bring myself to look her in the eye.  I have to tell her I don't really know to ask a girl out because I never have.  And she just looked so disappointed.  Like I was supposed to have an answer for her to something she'd been wondering about for so long and couldn't find anywhere else.  And the fluorescent light just keeps buzzing and suddenly the dress that I decided to wear to work today mattered way more than it did when I got dressed this morning because it says straight.  And straight says conservative and conservative says scary.  So I'm looking at the consent poster and my dress and finally reach Harper's eyes and I tell her, "No matter how the girl reacts, how you feel can never be wrong, so just be honest about how you feel."  Harper nods and goes off to her next class.  I realized, it's about time I take my own advice to my students so... I'm shaking, I'm sorry.  I am so out of my league.  The thing is, I've always hated the term straight.  It implies that everything else is crooked.  There are so many things in between.  And I think that maybe I'm one of those things.  And I hope that can be okay with you.  Because it is how I feel.